Fuck it

Have you ever felt like letting go in the hopes of getting a better grip?

Today felt like giving up. Many times. If you could give up on giving up, I would have done it.

Sadly, I haven’t been able to successfully fool myself into believing that I am someone great… and fabulous.. and that I’m already everything I want to be.

But if there’s a truth I can be proud of, I take refuge in knowing I’m capable of choosing goodness–as does everyone else.

That goodness can manifest in the minute instances of life. In the every day and any way. In the tiny choices we make that affect others in ways we don’t know.

And there are days when we decide to say a huge FUCK IT to goodness. To choose pride over concern. To choose safety over risk. To choose yourself over the other in front of you. Because yes, you’re pathetic. But also because it’s the easy way out. (Also, did I say because Fuck it??)

But the thought of that leads us to something especially human–the idea of redemption. To much disappointment, just because you were an asshole today doesn’t mean you will be tomorrow. He made life too good for us to be doomed by a single decision. We can and can and can and can choose to be better than we were yesterday.

So I guess tomorrow will be a better day because this too-good-for-us life isn’t going to give up on us even when we feel like shit has hit the fan. Because tomorrow will have a billion opportunities to choose goodness and yet again it is what we make of them that will define how great we can truly be.


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